Missing home and unsearchable truths

It is a feeling I am unfamiliar with, this missing home bit. But at the moment I wish I am breaking fast with my cell members in Sri Hartamas. Or having dinner with my mom, dad, brother and sister (and sister's boyfriend).

I wish I know what it all means; the way things and timings work.

My DUMC cell leader passed me my church membership certificate- just when my Singapore church, TCC, requires me to transfer my membership in order to be a commissioned spiritual-parent. When does DUMC move to the Dream Centre? The weekend when I have to submit my TCC membership application.

I am having great difficulty severing this cord. I bought into the vision of the Dream Centre. I gave much to it; in prayer and faith, too. I guess that's why I feel I am part of it; it is part of me. Perhaps the right perspective should be that I am helping to build the kingdom of God, not just DUMC.

There is something that would finally lock me down. Aileen and I are about to sign a tenancy agreement tomorrow. It is for two years. And because it cost so much I would need to be in a full time job always. No more jetting about.

And this is when I choose to feel like I want to be home.

Tell me Lord, great and unsearchable truths I do not know. If I see, maybe it won't be so difficult living on earth.